Being Fed


For everyone who partakes only of milk is not accustomed to the word of righteousness, for he is an infant. But solid food is for the mature…

Hebrews 5:13-14

One of the strong deciding factors I frequently hear people talk about in their  decision to leave their church and attend another is the phrase “I just wasn’t being fed.”

And this has become a difficult phrase for me, because Scripture doesn’t refer to the church in those terms. The Bible very clearly affirms being part of a group devoted to following Jesus (church). However, Jesus and the apostles’ teaching on how we get fed would probably surprise many contemporary Christians.

Let’s start with the writer of Hebrews. We quote Hebrews 5:13 and 14 quite frequently to encourage immature believers to move on to the deeper truths of the Bible. We emphasize the elements of these verses that refer to salvation truths as milk and “the deeper truths” as meat.

But these verses have another light to look at them in: Who feeds milk to a baby? Someone else. Who feeds solid food to the mature? Well, sometimes someone else. But usually the person feeding solid food to a mature person is the person himself.  In fact, I would argue that while some food can be prepared for a mature person by someone else, if the mature person isn’t feeding himself with the food, there’s probably something wrong!

My point is this: You weren’t designed to be fed by another spiritually. You were designed to have a direct relationship with God where you grow by feeding yourself. You were meant to dig into the Scriptures and find the truth for yourself. You were designed to have a living and alive relationship with the resurrected Jesus that fills your hungry heart.

So what good is a church family? Well a church family is designed to encourage you when the going gets tough. A church family is designed to equip you to be more like Christ.  A church family helps you see you blind spots and protects you from self-deception. Most of all, a church family is where you put into practice many of the things you’ve been learning from Christ: patience, service, love, humility, etc.

And that may happen through teaching, it may happen through the use of spiritual gifts, it may happen through a prophetic word. But there is a world of difference between starving yourself all week and gorging yourself on food on Sunday morning, and eating many times a week but still needing a pick me up if you’re tired or discouraged on Sunday.

But don’t give up on the people of God who you’ve committed yourself to because “you’re not getting fed.” Don’t abandon your important post of encouraging others because the teaching isn’t the flavor you’d hoped for.  Instead, go find the spiritual food yourself. Share what you have with others in a way that encourages them to find food for themselves. It will change you.

So how do we feed ourselves? Is there a method? How do you go from living on the food others have prepared to finding your own? We’ll look at that some tomorrow.


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About traviskolder

Travis Kolder is a follower of Jesus, a husband, a father of five, an organic church planter, and a writer. He lives in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, where he serves as part of the Cedar Rapids House Church Network.

5 responses to “Being Fed”

  1. gunnarlarmstrong says :

    I think everything you have said is really good. We are called to be regularly sitting at the Teacher’s (our Lord’s) feet for him to teach us. And, we should be sharing God’s truth with each other — when we do that, we are also going to be taught. And, we should be walking in genuine relationship throughout the week (more than just a mutual agreement to meet once or twice a week for a meeting). When we are really invested in people’s lives we are not going to quickly leave them behind. But, I think the real source for the “I’m not being fed” mentality is that we go to churches where we expect one person (or a group of people) to do all the teaching — and if he/they is/are not teaching well, we feel that we are not getting our main “dose” each week. In my opinion, God works through all of us. If the person (or people) are not doing a good job, then, step up to the plate. Explain that you feel that there is a need for more than what they are providing, and you believe that God is asking you to help fill in the void. We don’t have a right to sit down and expect someone else to do the work that God has given to the church. We don’t have the right to beg off, saying “I am not a teacher” or “I am not an evangelist” or “I am not a prophet”. If God calls us to step forward, God will enable us to serve. God will take our weaknesses and use them if we are willing to offer them.

    • traviskolder says :


      Thanks again for being such a great conversationalist on the blog! Your comments get to the heart of what I’m describing. I see so many believers settle for what someone else in the body gives them instead of what Jesus would give them personally. It’s a shame. Hopefully we more and more come to the place where we go to Jesus directly for our nourishment.

      • gunnarlarmstrong says :

        Amen. We often don’t go directly to Jesus for nourishment, and we often treat the church as if we were consumers, rather than an essential part of the body. No part of the body is designed to just receive — we are all designed to contribute with all that God has made us to be.

  2. melissadugan says :

    Real good stuff!

    Happy Connecting. Sent from my Sprint Phone.

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  1. How To Feed Yourself (Spiritually Speaking) | Pursuing Glory - February 12, 2017

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